Enough

     Last Sunday I listened to a sermon about how the Lord uses us in our weakness, how coming to the end of ourselves can be a redemptive thing when it allows the Lord to work in our lives. After listening to it, I basically thought to myself "well, that's nice" and filed it away for later.
      Later came faster than expected. In the space of a week I have gone from running the MOHI clinic on my own, to having a staff. Suddenly tasks are getting accomplished faster and I am having to learn to manage personalities in a culture that is not my own, in a language I still wrestle with. More than twice I have wondered when everyone was going to catch on that I am not enough for the task at hand. Not smart enough. Not strong enough. Not culturally sensitive enough. Not experienced enough. Not tall enough. Not enough.
    The thing is, all of those things are true. I am not enough for the task at hand, for the dreams that are being spun for the MOHI clinic. Left solely to my own knowledge and experience, I will make an utter mess of this thing that is so precious to me. Which I why I have been enormously grateful not to have been left to my own devices this week. There has been the grace of an international network of experienced health professionals to refer to for the program building. There have been people with more experience and insight into this culture than I have to talk me through laying a foundation of professionalism and respect for my new employees.
     More than anything, there has been the grace of me, on my knees before my God, begging for mercy as I negotiate these changes, begging for the grace to know how to proceed. Would you continue to join me in prayer for the MOHI clinic and the major and exciting changes we are making? Pray that we would work in unity for the good of our friends and neighbors, that we would learn to communicate and fit together well, that we would glorify the Lord in our thoughts and actions. Thank you.